By Any Other Name
You may have noticed that the name Erika Taylor no longer appears as part of Pro Remodeler and instead, the editor is Erika Mosse. Many of my friends in the industry have emailed me to ask if I got married or divorced, but the answer is actually more complex. It’s a story I’d like to share.
A number of you who know me also know that I lost my son, Aaron, to addiction in March of 2019. Aaron was brilliant, hilarious, and totally unique. He was my only child. The loss has been terrible. On top of missing Aaron with every breath, I was suddenly no longer a mom, but not not a mom either. The loss of my identity as a parent, as well as all future legacy, was yet another source of grief. I had a great job and a happy marriage, but the engine that drove my life forward, the heart of my heart, was my son.
My husband and I tried to adopt an older child, thinking we could help a young person who had a rough start in the world. But you’re required to foster first, and 70% of the time, those kids go back to their biological families.
So, after much discussion, we decided to have a baby of our own using IVF. It worked! Never in my wildest dreams could I have imagined that a combination of science, medicine, and a very gracious egg donor would make me a mother once again at 57.
Our son, Micah Mosse, was born on April 10.
Having a new baby was miraculous. I’ve embraced life again and can now grieve Aaron with love rather than only intolerable pain. Micah is his own person already, and I’m excited to see how this wonderful little being unfolds over time. I’ve also noticed that there are advantages to being a (much!) older parent that I didn’t anticipate, for example I am more patient, more relaxed, and more consciously present for every moment since at this stage of life I realize how quickly the time goes by. I’m also more intentional.
And that brings me to the actual point of this column. My husband, who was not Aaron’s father, suggested giving Micah my last name rather than his. This would celebrate the continuation of my family line. After thinking about it, I realized that the lineage I truly want to acknowledge is my mother’s. Micah carries her last name: Mosse.
But it’s hard on a kid to have a different last name than either of his parents, and so we decided that I would legally change my name to match Micah’s. Going forward, I am Erika Mosse. It feels strange to start going by a new name for the first time in my life, but it also feels right. Erika Mosse is a proud member of the remodeling industry She’s an editor, speaker, and event facilitator. But most importantly, she’s also a mother.
